Communication is probably the most important element of a successful homestay. Students choose homestay because they want to become more fluent in English. You are their most important English-speaking contact. When you spend time speaking with them, it not only improves their English skills, it also makes them feel welcome in your home as a member of the family.
Generally, students want to spend time speaking with you even though they may be shy and afraid of making mistakes. Many have had very limited opportunities to converse with native English speakers. In the past, most problems between families and students have been resolved when each party took the time to communicate mutual expectations. Be flexible and patient with your student.
At first it may be difficult to begin a conversation. Initially there will not be any rapport or understanding between yourself and your student. You student will probably be tired from a long flight, and possibly quite shy. Upon the arrival, it is best to be prepared and aware of current global issues and events to assist with conversation. Have an open mind and be willing to discuss things you may not normally talk about. Your student will most likely be doing the same.
Conversation starter questions could include:
- Have you been to Australia before?
- Why did you choose to study in Australia?
- Which city do you come from in your home country?
- Do you have a large or small family?
- Do you have photographs of your family?
- What languages do you speak?
- What did you study in your home country?
- What is your favourite food?
- Do you have any hobbies?
- Do you play any sports?
- Which attractions would you like to visit whilst in Australia?
- Have you travelled to any other countries?
It’s important to discuss expectations and family rules when your student arrives. Spend time during the first few days discussing your house rules with your student. The tone of this conversation should be friendly. Explain that you are doing this to help the student feel more comfortable in your home. Since most students can understand written English better than spoken English, use our House Rules template to help the student understand your expectations.
Remember to smile, even to joke. Remember though, students may be unable to comprehend subtle humour, your friendly intent may be misunderstood. On occasion, you may need to explain why you are laughing. Students with limited language ability may seem embarrassed because they feel that you are laughing at them.
Encourage your student to tell you about his or her country, city, family, school, hobbies, home, cultural activities, food, likes, and dislikes. These are all friendly conversation starters and topics. Students from some cultures may be uncomfortable talking about their family however, don’t push students to discuss these topics if they seem uncomfortable. Offer balancing pieces of information about Australian culture or your family traditions.
Encourage your student to ask questions about your home, our area, and Australian customs. One way to do this is to simply point out things in your home or popular activities. In Australia we tend to ask more questions than are considered polite in other countries. Students are curious about a lot of things, although they may be reluctant to ask questions. Once they know you like questions, they will ask lots of them.
If you think you haven’t been understood, rephrase your sentences. You can also ask them questions to make sure you have been understood correctly. Likewise, if you aren’t sure you understand something a student has said, rephrase the statement in your own words: “Do you mean . . . ?” Make sure you ask open ended questions to encourage conversation rather than questions requiring a simple ‘yes’ or ‘no.’ Some students will answer “yes” to almost any question, because they want to seem polite or because they don’t want to acknowledge they don’t understand. For example: “What time will I pick you up? Where will I meet you?” is more effective than “So you’ll meet me at the bookstore at 10:00?”
Keep a dictionary accessible. Look up words together with your student when you’re having a tough time defining a word so that the student can understand it. Many students have translators on their cell phones that can be helpful but encourage your student not to over use this or depend on it. You can also draw a simple picture to illustrate the meaning of a word. Ask the student to draw when you’re having difficulty understanding him or her.
Always remember to speak slowly if your student has difficulty comprehending spoken English. However it’s important not to drag-out-each-syl-la-ble-so-that-you-sound-like-a-ro-bot or you can write it down, this can often help if a student can’t understand your spoken English.
You student may need some time to process your questions and to think about their answers so allow thoughtful silence after you ask your student a question. In our culture, we often regard silence during a conversation as awkward. In many cultures (Japanese, for example), silence during a conversation is normal and acceptable.
Avoid negative questions and tag questions such as “don’t you feel well?” or tag questions such as “you don’t have a class this morning, do you?” as both these constructions are common in English but non-existent in other languages. These language constructions are confusing to many non-native English speakers.
Help your students to phrase their questions. Don’t make assumptions about politeness based on a student’s choice of words or intonation patterns. A phrase such as “I want to eat [food]” is actually the politest way to phrase something in some languages and cultures. If you feel that a student’s way of speaking indicates impoliteness, tactfully point out what it is that sounds rude. Whenever possible give the student a phrase that can be substituted for the impolite pattern. For example: “I’d like to have . . .” instead of “I want . . .”; “You don’t have to . . .” instead of “You must not. . .”
If you are uncomfortable with a student’s behaviour, be careful how you discuss the subject. Our culture tends to be more straightforward about problems than most other cultures, and being too blunt can hurt a student’s feelings. This doesn’t mean that the behaviour shouldn’t be discussed and the situation resolved, contact your local office for advice on how to approach issues you are experiencing.
Occasionally, we have a student whose expectations are very demanding. For example, the student wants you to do personal laundry, drive them places, or have dinner at 8:00 p.m. every night. Don’t feel that you need to change your home and lifestyle to fit the student as long as you are providing what you’ve agreed to. Perhaps you need to explain your cultural expectations and family rules again in a positive way. On the other hand, be thoughtful about what you can do to make your home comfortable for your student. Perhaps on reflection, the student’s “demand” is a reasonable request that you might be able to accommodate, or where possible, compromise so the arrangement suits both you and the student.
Remember, the student is a part of your family so any communication among the members of your family affects the student. For example, if you and your child are having an argument, you might raise your voices or speak in tones that connote anger. Homestay students are typically very embarrassed and feel uncomfortable when they witness this. It may be best to excuse yourselves to another room if tempers flare. In addition, you might explain to the student that the argument concerns you and your child, not the student.
Always remember to ask for help if there is a serious communication problem. Your local office is available to answer your questions and concerns wherever they can. It may also be helpful to have a translator – often a student has a friend whose English-language skills are strong enough to help also.
