Creating a Positive Homestay Environment

Eye Contact
In some cultures, avoiding eye contact is a sign of respect or is expected when talking to someone of the opposite gender. Do not automatically assume your guest is being rude if they don’t look at you when you’re speaking to them.

Smiling
Smiling can sometimes be used to cover sadness, anger, worry or embarrassment.

Some guests may only be accustomed to smiling at people within their family unit. Students from some European countries rarely smile until they start to relax and get to know you, so understanding that this is normal behaviour is very important for homestay hosts.

Pointing and Beckoning
Pointing and beckoning with a bent/hooked finger can be insulting in some cultures – particularly people with an African, Asian and Latino background –  as it’s commonly associated with calling a dog.

Physical Contact

In many Asian cultures, the head is the most sacred part of the body and should not be touched. Touching a guest on the head is not seen as appropriate.

Greeting with a kiss or hug may be usual in your home, but is not acceptable to many other cultures.

Some guests will be willing to shake hands, many will be happier with a nod.

In some circumstances e.g. offering medical assistance or helping with an activity, there may be a need for physical contact. In these situations:

• Respect personal space
• Seek permission from your guest where possible
• Explain to your guest what contact will occur and why
• Make contact within view of a third party to avoid any misunderstandings, especially if contact needs to be made in a more private situation

Additionally, hosts should:

• Encourage guests to spend free time in public areas of the house, not alone in his/her bedroom.
• Avoid close physical contact with guests when alone e.g. hugging, wrestling, etc.
• Never personally search a guest or his/her property.
• Not confiscate your guests’ property* e.g. their mobile phone.
  – We have had hosts take a guest’s phone because they were on it during dinner or using it at bedtime.
  –  A phone is your guests’ connection to home during a time when they are feeling quite vulnerable, so please be empathetic in this situation.
  – It’s ok to make house rules such as ‘no phones at the table/during mealtime’ and ‘be off your phone by <time>’ for Under 18s, but you should not confiscate their phone.
  – Please contact your local AHN office if guests are not obeying your house rules and we will get their school involved (Under 18s) or contact them directly (Over 18s) to address the behaviour issues.
  >> Contact AHN immediately if there is a concern about you or your guest’s safety and there is a need to see or restrict a guest’s possessions.

Verbal Communication

Language Barriers

• International students are required to meet minimum English proficiency levels, so may not necessarily be fluent English speakers.
• Listen and observe, especially when it comes to “yes” and “no” answers.
  – A guest may nod their heads “yes” in agreement even when they don’t understand.
  – In some cultures, it may be extremely disrespectful to say no or to turn down an invitation.
  – There are many ways of saying no. A lack of response does not mean yes.
• Pronunciation, accents and using local phrases can make it difficult for foreigners to understand what you’re saying.
  – e.g. “How are you going?” might not make any sense to begin with, let alone if they hear it as “Howayagoin?”.
• After giving instructions or discussing important topics, ask your guest to summarise what they understood to ensure there hasn’t been any misunderstanding.
  – If it’s task-based e.g. showing them how to use your washing machine, do it with them the first couple of times and have them complete the steps while you’re there to guide them.
• Using visual aids such as pictures and gestures can help convey meaning when extra clarification is needed.
• Have a translation app handy for those moments when you and your guest are struggling to communicate (try DeepL).
• Be aware of your tone and responses.
  – How you say something can affect the interpretation of what you are saying, especially when there are language barriers.
• Here are Eight Ways To Support English Learners recommended by AHN host, Tanya.

Third-party Communication

• International students will often speak to their parents or agent rather than the person with whom they are having an issue.
  – This tends to be so they don’t offend you as their host. We encourage guests to communicate directly with their homestay family but your local AHN office can assist if they are frequently avoiding you.

Joking

• If you joke around with guests a lot or your guests joke with each other, it’s a good idea to check in with each of them periodically to make sure they are not offended.
  – Just because someone doesn’t speak up doesn’t mean they aren’t feeling hurt. It’s important to ask.

Inappropriate Language

• Abusive or offensive language e.g. swearing, derogatory terms and innuendo are unacceptable.
• Inappropriate comments or behaviour related to a person’s race, religion, gender, sexuality or disability will not be tolerated.

Hosts and guests should be mindful of the following:

• Avoid asking lots of questions about someone’s private life or making personal comments about their appearance, size or clothing.
• Respect peoples’ personal space and avoid unnecessary physical contact.
• Avoid being alone with your guest/hosts in a bedroom or bathroom.
• Do not send inappropriate or explicit messages or images via text, email, social media, etc.
• Violence in any form will not be tolerated.
• Do not consume excessive amounts of alcohol or use illegal drugs.
• When it comes to privacy:
  – Ask permission before taking photographs or making video recordings in the home.
  – Privacy should be respected when someone is in the bathroom or bedroom (i.e. knock first and wait for a response).
• Understand that there are differences in what is perceived to be ‘appropriate’ depending on a person’s age, maturity and cultural background. Your behaviour could be considered harassment.
  – “Intention” does not form a part of harassment. This means that regardless of whether a person intends to act in an offensive, humiliating or intimidating way, any unwelcome conduct or physical contact which makes the other person uncomfortable may be deemed to be harassment.
  – A single incident can amount to harassment.
  – Refer to the AHN Sexual Harassment and Abuse Prevention Policy.

Culture and Religion

One of the most important benefits of a homestay is ‘cultural exchange’ – the chance for your family and your guests to share your experiences, values, culture and customs. Have an open mind and remember that it’s an opportunity to respectfully learn from each other.

• Explain which activities your guest is welcome to participate in e.g. birthdays, holidays, religious activities, food practices and other customs or celebrations.
  – They may want to listen and observe but not participate in certain events or activities.
  – Some may want to take part as a once-off, however, they shouldn’t be expected to join in on every occasion.
• Encourage your guests to share information and stories about their background and traditions. They may invite you to experience activities and events with them or show you other ways to learn about their culture and beliefs (e.g. cooking certain dishes or doing some craft).
• If you carry out day-to-day “traditions” or spiritual customs in the home, you may need to explain these to your guest. In the same way, your guests may have certain personal or religious practices they need to fulfil and should be comfortable doing so in your home.